3 Words For The Happiest New Year Ever

Golden Rule Yourself

Most people are familiar with the Golden Rule: treat others the way you want to be treated.

But here’s a question—are you doing that for yourself? Not “Are you treating others how you’d want to be treated?” but “Are you treating yourself the way you want to be treated?”

This might seem like an odd question since I often write about productivity and time management, but it’s a crucial aspect of personal growth.

When I was six or seven years old, I had a wonderful piano teacher. What made her wonderful wasn’t just her skill; it was how she made me feel. She made me believe I could play the piano. Decades later, the only thing I remember about those lessons is her praise and how much I wanted to keep playing.

When I was eight, my family moved, and I got a new piano teacher. That experience was entirely different. All I remember is that nothing I did was ever good enough. After two years of loving piano, I quit within two months of starting lessons with the new teacher.

Now, here’s the real question: which teacher more closely resembles the way you talk to yourself?

Are you encouraging yourself to win at life and level up? Or are you constantly telling yourself you’re behind, bad at things, or that everyone else is better?

If a friend spoke to you the way you speak to yourself, would you stay friends with them?

Think back: have you ever had a great teacher, coach, manager, or parent who helped you become an even better version of yourself? How about one who was never satisfied with you? Which one inspired you to grow and learn more?

Being hard on yourself isn’t just unkind—it’s ineffective. This year, let’s try something different. Here are four quick thoughts to guide your new year:

1. Remember what’s important.
   The goal isn’t to be “better at” or “more of” anything—it’s to have a good life. If you make yourself miserable in pursuit of a good life, are you really succeeding?

2. Celebrate your wins.
   You probably congratulate your friends on their successes, so don’t forget to celebrate your own. And really mean it.

3. Accept that setbacks are part of the journey.
   Think about how you’d encourage a friend after a setback. You’d remind them that they’re great, that setbacks are temporary, and that they’ll bounce back. Be your own friend when setbacks inevitably arise.

4. Measure yourself against your past, not your future.
   It’s easy to feel like you’re “not there yet” with your goals. But remember: goals are, by definition, something you haven’t reached yet. Once you achieve them, they’re no longer goals—they’re accomplishments. Don’t dwell on who you’re not yet. Instead, marvel at who you’ve already become.

As I write this, we’re preparing to roll into 2025. A new year is just an arbitrary date for change, but it’s as good a time as any. I hope you’ll carry the Golden Rule with you throughout the year—especially when it comes to yourself.

Until next time, slay!